Thursday, May 12, 2016

Writing exercise: Plot #3 ENG

Instructions

Begin a scene where someone wants a concrete physical object more than anything else in the world. Now include each of the five key components of a scene as you’re writing:


1.      An action. Scenes usually start with a specific action;
2.      Dialogue. Is what two characters say to each other. All dialogue, and in fact every sentence you write should do two things, deepen our understanding of the character speaking that dialog or advance the plot, or both;
3.      Specific intimate details;
4.      Inner point of view. What are you thinking, viewing and processing;
5.      Definite starting point and a stopping point. Usually the starting point is the action, while the stopping point is a conclusion we get by adding the other points to that action.


Write for a bit minutes, then give that character a disease where they learn they have only 24 hours to live. This is your first significant rising action.
Write some more, then give that character a choice between that object and an antidote. This is your second significant rising action.
Finish the story with a conclusion. Your final story should not exceed 400 words.
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To see the stars again

He stretched his arm out of the steel bars of the jail, aiming at the rusted key in front of him, on the damp stone floor. The most perverse torture for those who were imprisoned in the fortress of Ykson, was the impossibility to see the sky. Small hatches in each jail’s ceiling were always locked.

Abel’s hand was all bones. His long nails scratched against the rock, trying to get his fingers closer to the key. He remembered the days when he was a powerful sorcerer, but recalled them with regret, thinking about his current situation.
Betrayed and deceived, Abel was enchained and tortured for years. Dark feelings of hate and despair lived with him in that gloomy, cubic prison, but when they disappeared, what remained was just loneliness. He hadn’t never experienced such a helplessness before. Abel had distanced himself from everyone who could’ve helped him, because he thought that he could’ve fixed everything on his own.
However, while his long dark hair pressed against the cold steel bars, he questioned himself about his past decisions.
Abel grabbed the rusted key, feeling a sense of relief just by touching the rough metal, but suddenly a whip cracked the air, hitting the hand of the prisoner mercilessly. The key fell down on the floor, jingling while the prison warden approached.
«That is not for you, necromancer.»
A black cloak hid a thin, wiry body, but couldn’t conceal the sadistic pleasure in that feminine voice.
«Did you enjoy the meal? I think you did. It was the first piece of bread after a week.»
Abel remained silent. He withdrew his hand and caressed the new whip wound on its back.
«I bet you were so hungry that you haven’t noticed the poison on the bread. What if I’d tell you that you only have twenty four hours left?»
That discovery left Abel astonished. While was constantly taunting him, the prison warden tied the extremity of a fine string to the key, and the other extremity to a small bottle. She approached them to her prisoner, then she arranged an iron wedge in the middle of the string.
«Let’s play, necromancer. Choose an item and take it, the other one will be dragged to me. An antidote to save your life, or the key to see the sky?»
Abel moved fast and grabbed the key. Better to die than to live life in chains, he thought.


***Personal grade: 7/10***
Personal opinion. Describe a scene isn't an easy task. Do it well, by including all the five key points, it's very hard. This is a decent work. I was very involved when I wrote it, and reading it again after a few months still leaves me satisfied. I think my work goes slightly beyond the sufficiency, despite the number of words was definitely limitating.

Esercizio di scrittura: Trama #3 ITA

Istruzioni

Cominciare a descrivere una scena in cui qualcuno vuole un oggetto concreto piĆ¹ di qualsiasi altra cosa al mondo. Ora, continuare a scrivere includendo tutti i cinque punti chiave di una scena:

1.      Un’azione. La scena solitamente comincia con un’azione specifica;
2.      Dialogo. CiĆ² che due o piĆ¹ personaggi si dicono l’un l’altro. Ogni dialogo, e nello specifico ogni frase, dovrebbe approfondire la conoscenza sul personaggio che sta parlando oppure far avanzare la trama, o entrambe le cose;
3.      Dettagli intimi specifici;
4.      Punto di vista interiore. Cosa il personaggio pensa, osserva e considera;
5.      Definire un punto di partenza e un punto di blocco. Solitamente il punto di partenza ĆØ l’azione, mentre il punto di blocco ĆØ una conclusione alla quale arriviamo aggiungendo all’azione i punti precedenti.
Scrivere per qualche minuto, quindi dare al personaggio un malessere per cui scopre che gli rimangono solo 24 ore di vita. Questa ĆØ il primo significativo crescendo.
Scrivere ancora un po’, quindi dare al personaggio una scelta tra l’oggetto e un antidoto. Questo ĆØ il secondo importante crescendo.
Terminare la storia con una conclusione. La storia non deve superare le 400 parole.
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Per rivedere le stelle


AllungĆ² la mano oltre le sbarre d’acciaio della sua cella, puntando alla chiave arrugginita di fronte a lui, ferma sull’umido pavimento di pietra. La piĆ¹ perversa delle torture per coloro che venivano imprigionati nella fortezza di Ykson, era l’impossibilitĆ  di vedere il cielo. Piccoli portelli, presenti in ogni cella, erano sempre chiusi a chiave.
Le mani di Abel erano ossute. Le sue lunghe unghie graffiavano contro la roccia, mentre le sue dita cercavano di avvicinarsi alla chiave. L’uomo ricordava i giorni in cui era un potente stregone, ma li rimembrava con rimorso, pensando alla sua situazione attuale.
Tradito e ingannato, Abel era stato incatenato e torturato per anni. Oscuri sentimenti di odio e disperazione vivevano con lui in quella cubica cella oscura, ma quando essi scomparivano ciĆ² che rimaneva era soltanto la solitudine. Non aveva mai sperimentato una tale impotenza prima di allora. Abel si era allontanato da tutti quelli che avrebbero potuto aiutarlo, perchĆ© credeva che avrebbe potuto risolvere tutto da solo.
Comunque, mentre i lunghi capelli neri erano schiacciati contro le fredde sbarre d’acciaio, si interrogava sulle sue decisioni passate.
Abel afferrĆ² la chiave arrugginita, provando un senso di sollievo semplicemente toccando il metallo grezzo, ma all’improvviso una frusta fendette l’aria, colpendo senza pietĆ  la mano del prigioniero. La chiave cadde sul pavimento, tintinnando mentre una guardia si avvicinava.
«Quella non ĆØ per te, negromante.»
Il mantello nero nascondeva un corpo snello e formoso, ma non poteva celare il sadico piacere di quella voce femminile.
«Il pasto era buono? Suppongo di sƬ. Era il primo pezzo di pane dopo una settimana.»
Abel rimase in silenzio. RitirĆ² la sua mano e accarezzĆ² la nuova ferita di frusta sul dorso.
«Scommetto che eri cosƬ affamato da non aver notato il veleno nel pane. Cosa faresti se ti dicessi che ti restano solo ventiquattro ore?»
Quella scoperta lasciĆ² Abel impietrito. Mentre continuava a provocarlo, la guardia legĆ² l’estremitĆ  di un sottile filo alla chiave, e l’altra estremitĆ  ad una piccola boccetta. Li avvicinĆ² al prigioniero, poi posizionĆ² un cuneo di ferro a metĆ  del filo.
«Facciamo un gioco, negromante. Scegli un oggetto e prendilo. L’altro sarĆ  trascinato verso di me. Un’antidoto per salvarti la pelle o la chiave per vedere il cielo?»
Abel scattĆ² per afferrare la chiave. Meglio morire che vivere in catene, pensĆ².


***Voto personale: 7/10***
Parere personale.Descrivere una scena non ĆØ facile. Farlo bene, includendo tutti e cinque i punti chiave, ĆØ difficilissimo. Questo ĆØ un pezzo decente. Ero molto preso quando l'ho scritto e anche rileggerlo dopo qualche mese mi lascia soddisfatto.Credo di aver fatto un lavoro che va leggermente oltre la sufficienza, nonostante il numero di parole fosse decisamente limitante.

Friday, May 6, 2016

Writing exercise: Plot #2 ENG



Instructions

Write a short story of 100-200 words about a trip to the doctor or dentist using the ABDCE structure. Check the Process section at this link. An example is reproduced below:

One night when I was eight years old I opened a bag of Doritos to eat while watching television. (A) Doritos were my favorite snack to eat as a child. Nacho Cheese was my favorite flavor. (B) I loved sitting in the dark hearing the “crunch, crunch, crunch” of the chips. I’d sit there, crunching my chips, but didn’t eat the chips with a napkin (what kid does?) and would forget about the powder that accumulated on my fingertips. As it got later and I got sleepier, I kept rubbing my eyes, my fingertips covered in Doritos Nacho Cheese powder. (D) When it was time for bed, I went to brush my teeth, looked in the mirror, and saw two large bags under my eyes. The Doritos Nacho Cheese powder had pooled into two large sacks underneath my eyeballs. I started screaming and crying. (C) The next day, my grandmother took me to the doctor who put industrial strength eye drops into my eyes to flush out the powder. (E)

Remember, the action in this story isn’t the actual doctor’s office visit. The action is what LEADS you to the doctor’s office

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Do something

Yesterday afternoon I was in the city park, where I beat up two guys who were harassing a dog. (A) I grew up in an infamous district, without rules or law in the streets, and I was too young for fighting the gangs who killed animals for sport. (B) However, I could do something that time, so I approached them. They were younger than I expected. I told them to stop a few times, but they did not. Then I explained them that harming defenseless animals is not funny but, as always, bullies were blind to reason. (D) The anger inside me erupted and I ended up breaking them one finger and two teeth. While I was watching them biting the dust, a big hand grabbed my shoulder. A croaky voice told me that I had done well by punishing them, but I had overdid. I barely saw a line of knuckles on a collision route with my left eye. (C) When I woke up, a few minutes later, the little dog was licking my forehead. I smiled at him, then I went to the nearest doctor office to recover and heal the dog’s wounds. (E)

***Personal grade: 6.5/10***
Personal opinion. Another simple exercise, in which however is tested your synthesis ability to include in a few words all the sections of which a story is composed. Unfortunately, even doing the exercise correctly, it's hard to be satisfied of your own work when you are bounded to use such a small amount of words.